Tuesday, January 26, 2016

Prometheus School of R.A.F.T.s Timeline

Prometheus School of R.A.F.T.s timeline

WARNING! Spoilers ahead!

-1000000000: (-1 billion) Kevin, Stuart, Bob, and all of the other minions are born.
July 1, 1899: Dr. Henry "Indiana" Jones Jr. is born.
May 23, 1934: Indiana Jones establishes the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things, where anyone can learn to outrun stuff in a straight line.
1936: After getting the Golden Idol from a cave, a boulder rolls down and Indiana runs away from it in a straight line, barely managing to make it out of the cave entrance/exit in time before the boulder blocks it.
Winter 1950: Buckaroo Banzai is born.
May 23, 1955: John McClane is born.
November 12, 1955: After Marty McFly (who came back in time with Doctor Emmett Brown from October 26, 1985) steals a sports almanac from Biff that Biff's future self gave him from October 21, 2015, Biff chases down Marty with his car inside a tunnel and Marty has to get away from him on a hoverboard in a straight line. Marty barely manages to make it to the end of the tunnel in time to be rescued by Emmett Brown while Biff's car crashes into a truck of manure.
July 1956: Peter Griffin is born.
Fall 1964: Sarah Connor is born.
June 12, 1968: Marty McFly is born.
June 30, 1968: After Stuart and Bob accidentally make a chandelier fall on Scarlet Overkill during her coronation as the new Queen of England because Bob didn't want to steal Scarlet's dream and he let her have Queen Elizabeth 2's crown that he somehow earned by pulling a sword out of a stone to defend himself against cops who were chasing him after he, Kevin and Stuart hijacked and crashed the Queen's carriage, Scarlet orders everyone to get the minions. Kevin, Stuart and Bob run away in a straight line, crashing through the windows and going down the street. Eventually, they hide in a telephone booth after a guy throws a spiky ball rolling at them, where another guy with a chainsaw awaits them. They get out and continue to run down the streets and avoid the trip wire made from a rope that a guy was holding on the other side of a street tied to a lamppost while the other people behind them trip on the rope and fall down. Another guy's huge drill machine came up out of the ground and they split up. Kevin ran in one direction and Stuart and Bob ran in the other direction. A clown juggling bombs while on a unicycle was chasing Stuart and Bob and they split up in different directions as well. Stuart ran into the fat belly of a sumo wrestler, Kevin ran around a lamppost until another guy stabbed it trying to kill him and the lamppost fell on the guy with the sword. Bob climbed over a fence to hide, but then Frankie Fish Lips appeared out of a hole in the ground in disguise as a random puddle and pulled him in. Bob barely managed to get out long enough to grab his teddy bear Tim before getting pulled in again. Stuart and Bob got captured by Scarlet's henchmen and only Kevin escaped.
May 29, 1970: Anthony Edward Stark, Iron Man, is born.
May 13, 1977: After Orville the albatross carries Bernard and Bianca to Devil's Bayou to rescue a girl named Penny, he starts to fly away when they arrive and get off, only to be chased back by Medusa's swampmobile, so he flies away in a straight line, only to be sucked in and pushed out the other end of the swampmobile covered in smoke. He gets mad and says "Watch where you're going!" afterwards.
June 5, 1978: Grover Underwood is born.
1979: Barry William Cox is born.
June 20, 1979: While making a 5 1/2 minute home movie using Super 8 film called The Case, Joe Lamb tries to capture the sound of the train for production value. However, a car driven by Dr. Thomas Woodward crashes into the train and causes it to crash and fly all over the place. While Preston, Martin, and Jen Kaznyk run under the station house, Joe Lamb, Cary, and Charles Kaznyk run away from the train in a straight line. One of the train cars lands in front of them and they run in different directions, and after about a minute of running and crashing, the train finally explodes, but they all survive.
1980: Mateo Fernando Aquino Liwanag is born.
September 25, 1982: Alex Browning is born.
May 12, 1984: The T-800 steals a gasoline truck to try and kill Sarah Connor. Sarah runs away from the truck in a straight line down the middle of the road, then runs to the sidewalk. However, this doesn't help because the T-800 still drives the gasoline truck onto the sidewalk anyway and destroys a mailbox. Kyle Reese puts a stick of dynamite in the truck's back pipe and makes it explode.
June 12, 1984: When the Red Lectoids find Buckaroo Banzai and 3 of them fail to catch him, another 1 chases after Buckaroo in a truck. Buckaroo outruns the truck long enough for Scooter and Casper Lindley to save him with a helicopter ladder to take him up and away from the truck.
December 25, 1988: After John McClane fires his gun in the air to get everyone else on the roof of a 40-floor building downstairs to the 30th floor to rescue Holly Gennaro from Professor Hans Gruber, a helicopter from above shoots down at John McClane, who he runs in a straight line to jump down to the lower part of the roof and yells out "I'm on your side, you assholes!"
September 19, 1989: Hermione Granger is born.
March 1, 1990: Ron Weasley is born.
July 30, 1990: Neville Longbottom is born.
July 31, 1990: Harry Potter is born.
Between August 1, 1990 and May 31, 1991: Geoff is born.
February 13, 1991: Luna Lovegood is born.
August 11, 1991: Ginny Weasley is born.
Between August 1, 1992 and June 30, 1993: Brody is born.
July 11, 1993: Candace Gertrude Flynn is born.
July 12, 1993: Annabeth Chase is born.
August 18, 1993: Percy Jackson is born.
June 5, 1994: After Scar and the hyenas get wildebeests to stampede into a valley with Simba in it, Simba runs away in a straight line instead of running to clear space on the side. He climbs onto a fallen tree branch when Mufasa comes to save him. A wildebeest breaks the branch and sends Simba flying into the air until Mufasa catches him. Mufasa gets carried away by the stampede, but then he manages to climb up the side of the valley away from the stampede until Scar kills him by throwing him onto the ground from high up. Meanwhile, Timon and Pumbaa are in the same valley looking for a place to live together and the wildebeests start chasing them shortly after Simba. They end up riding on top of one of the wildebeests until they fall off of the edge of the valley and fall into a river where Timon rides on Pumbaa until they fall down a waterfall and survive.
December 3, 1994: Twilight Sparkle is born.
Fall 1998: When Andy wants to take Buzz to Pizza Planet as his one toy, Woody tries to get rid of Buzz by ramming him under Andy's desk with RC. RC knocks over a bulletin board with Andy's drawings of Buzz. The bulletin board falls and knocks a globe loose from its globe stand which rolls after Buzz. Buzz Lightyear slips on 5 pencils in his way and rolls towards the window. The globe knocks around a desk lamp that knocks Buzz off the windowsill, and Mr. Potato Head accuses Woody of attempted murder. He and the other toys almost gather around Woody to throw him out the window before Andy comes back in and takes Woody to Pizza Planet when Buzz is missing.
July 2, 1997: A mysterious guy with a hook and a rain slicker in a car chases down Barry William Cox, who runs away in a straight line, then runs to the side, but then the car also moves that way as well. The car crashes into a billboard and a dock and Barry wakes up in the hospital the next day.
July 4, 1997: Barry William Cox dies when the guy in a rain slicker takes him backstage during the beauty pageant with Helen Rivers in it. Barry is stabbed multiple times with a hook. Helen Rivers sees this and want to go up there to save him, but no one wants her to leave the beauty pageant.
May 13, 2000: Alex Browning has a premonition of Flight 180 exploding and tries to get everyone out. Carter Horton and Terry Chaney fight with him and they also get taken off with him. Billy Hitchcock, who was in the bathroom when the lock was stuck, also gets pushed out with them and Miss Valerie Lewton asks Mr. Larry Murmau to go back on the plane to France with the students of Mt. Abraham High School. Tod Waggner also leaves the plane after his brother George asks him to go check on Alex and Clear Rivers also leaves because she didn't see what Alex saw, but she felt it was real and left to go stay with him. Carter argues with Alex again about him making them miss their flight just because he had a bad dream, but it turns out to be real after Flight 180 really explodes and somehow makes the airport windows fall apart despite it being too far away.
June 24, 2000: 6 weeks after Flight 180 exploded on May 13, 2000, lightning strikes a tree that falls on Alex as he's trying to rescue Clear (who was next on Death's list after they escaped Flight 180 when they were meant to die in Alex's vision) and he has to run away from it in a straight line on his way there. The tree falls on Alex as he's running away and he falls into a mud puddle, but eventually makes it out before he drowns to death.
December 24, 2000: Alex, Clear and Carter all go back to Paris and toast to Tod, Terry, and all of their friends who couldn't be here, but realize that they only got to live 6 more months after a Le Café 081 sign almost kills Alex and Carter saves him, but then gets killed by the sign instead when it swings back at him.
December 26, 2000: Star Butterfly is born.
March 25, 2001: Alex Browning dies when a loose brick falls on him in an alley off Sycamore and Edinburgh when he was talking to Clear after staying home for 3 months because he was next on Death's list.
September 30, 2003: Riley Andersen (plus her emotions, Joy, Sadness, Anger, Disgust, and Fear) is born.
November 10, 2003: Marlin and Dory swim away from a broken sunken ship in a straight line when it starts to fall off a sea cliff.June 17, 2006: Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, Hermione Granger, Neville Longbottom, Ginny Weasley, and Luna Lovegood all run away from falling shelves of crystal balls after Ginny's Reducto spell knocks back a Death Eater and indirectly causes the shelves to fall down like dominoes. They run away in a straight line, then turn to the right out of their way, but the surrounding shelves are also falling down in a spreading circle. They barely make it to the emergency escape door in time to get out and fall down to a room with a veil where they fight more Death Eaters with the Order of the Phoenix.
June 18, 2007: Percy Jackson, Annabeth Chase, Grover Underwood, Tyson, Clarisse LaRue, and Luke's 6 henchmen run away from Kronos in a straight line after he shows up and eats Luke and makes slow giant steps towards them. Annabeth and Clarisse hide behind posts, Tyson hides under the boardwalk, Grover gets eaten by Kronos before he can hide, and Percy finds the golden sword he needs that he later uses to defeat Kronos and save Grover.
July 19, 2007: Johnny Test runs away from Susan and Mary's bath-bot in a straight line and jumps on a vine to swing around the bath-bot and the lake he was running towards to avoid taking a bath to surprise Dukey with a water park bath for his birthday.
July 15, 2009: At the Super Duper Mega Store, Vanessa is after a tube of Pizzazzium Infonionite for her father, Dr. Heinz Doofenshmirtz, but Baljeet and Buford get it first while Heinz and Vanessa are watching a short film from 1944 about how it was discovered in 1894. However, Buford later drops it and Candace and Stacy find it. They later keep continually chasing each other to get it, when Dr. Doofenshmirtz later turns on a lawnmower that's started by pushing a button to start it. The lawnmower chases Baljeet, Buford, Candace, and Stacy until the pizzazzium that they were chasing falls down an escalator going up. Candace and Stacy go after it, but then they fall down the escalator and keep going back up and down in the same place. Baljeet and Buford are riding on a shopping cart that crashes into them, which hits a line of other shopping carts in front, propelling them into the air and making them fall into an aisle full of cards that they caused to fall down on impact. Stacy finds a card there for a spilled cheese dog with mustard.
July 24, 2010: During the Ridonculous Race episode in Vietnam, one of the challenges was to find a travel tip in a cave. At one point, Geoff and Brody step on a square that makes a boulder roll out and they run away in a straight line, then run out of the same part of the cave that they came in. Fortunately for them, the boulder mysteriously disappeared and they didn't get blocked out of the cave from Carrie, Devin, Emma and Kitty.
April 23, 2011: After being convinced that Twilight Sparkle doesn't love him anymore because she has Aloysius/Owlowicius now, Spike goes to hide out in a cave with another dragon who's way bigger than him and has lots of gems. However, the big dragon doesn't like Spike, and tries to attack him. Twilight and Aloysius come to rescue Spike and Spike jumps on Twilight's back before she runs out of the dragon's cave in a straight line when the dragon breathes huge fire. Twilight continues to run in a straight line with Aloysius guiding her when the dragon catches up and gets away when the dragon hits 2 fallen trees that are crossing each other. After they're finally out of the woods, Twilight tells Spike that he will always be her #1 assistant and friend who no one could replace and she only needed Aloysius to help her at night.
May 19, 2012: During the longest fight ever with Ernie the giant chicken (5 minutes, 35 seconds, to be exact), Ernie steals an ice cream truck from Jonathan Herbert and drives it towards Peter, who runs away in a straight line. Peter almost gets run over, but he hangs onto the front of the ice cream truck and punches Ernie, causing it to crash into a lamppost.
August 12, 2012: A Melter melts the baseline of a water tower, and Tony Stark runs away before the tower falls down and floods the area.
September 9, 2015: After Joy and Sadness get sucked up a tube with Riley's 5 happy core memories after Joy tried to get rid of Riley's sad core memory that she just got, they try to get back to Headquarters by walking across the line from Goofball Island, but then it falls down because Riley's dad tried to start up Goofball Island and Riley's core memories aren't there to power up her Islands of Personality. Joy and Sadness run back before Goofball Island falls apart and barely manage to outrun a giant falling drum from the island in a straight line and escape the ground surrounding it before that also falls with Goofball Island.
November 15, 2015: When Star Butterfly is on her way to get the Banagic Wand from the As Featured On TV store, she goes to a pirate-themed restaurant where she thinks the waiters really are pirates and they kidnapped the customers. She plays along with the waiters and tells the customers that she will get them all out of there. Star uses her wand to trap one waiter in pink goo and shrink another and destroyed at least one table in the process. The other waiters chase Star out of the restaurant, where she runs out and jumps onto the roof of a bus stop waiting station with a Banagic Wand poster on the side. She sees the As Featured on TV store from that distance and borrows a woman's shopping cart to get over there. The road was sloped on the way there and Star had to ride down there to get away from the pirate waiters chasing her in a straight line. The shopping cart almost hits a bus, but then Star uses her wand to make horse legs appear out of the road to kick the shopping cart she was in over the bus and in front of the As Featured on TV store.
December 19, 2015: On one of the last warm weekends of the year, Amy is working in the stockroom at Cloud 9 because she didn't want to argue with Jonah about him knowing more about working there than her because he was the only employee to get 100% on a test despite being new there. Jonah comes in to help Amy and tells her that they are out of Nosey the Anteater, so Amy tries to operate a new, complicated forklift to get the box from the top shelf. However, she accidentally makes the whole shelf of boxes fall over and she and Jonah are lying on plush toys on the floor. She looks up at the shelf and notices that the bolts are pretty rusty and that could have made the shelf fall over easily. Jonah gets up and accidentally moves a lever that makes the forklift move forward out of the stockroom. The forklift pursues Mateo, who runs away in a straight line and knocks over the secret shopper. Mateo gets out of the forklifts way by getting on some bags of dog food while Amy and Jonah come to stop the forklift and Jonah asks Mateo if he is all right.
August 28, 2017: Sarah Connor tells Kyle Reese (the young one from this time, not the future one with her from 2029) to run in a straight line and never look back, which is what you do at the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things. Kyle from 2029 also told her the same thing before they traveled from May 10, 1984 to August 28, 2017, but he wasn't sure when he was told that until up to this point. Either way, causality time loop or not, this happened because Sarah Connor went to the Prometheus School of Running Away From Things like we saw in the first film (except that this 5th film resets history from the first 4 films after Skynet sends back a T-1000 to kill Sarah in 1973).
September 5, 2017: (insert Going the Extra Milo running moment here)
Novemberish 2017: (insert Backward to School Night running moment here)
Decemberish 2017: (insert Snow Way Out running moment here)
October 16, 2023: Black Widow dies after she sacrifices herself for the Soul stone.
October 17, 2023: Tony Stark dies after he snaps his fingers to destroy Thanos and all of his minions. The snap burns Tony's arm and he dies from his injuries.
2093: Elizabeth Shaw and Meredith Vickers run away from a giant rolling donut spaceship in a straight line. Meredith Vickers falls down and doesn't roll over to the side, causing her to get crushed, but Elizabeth Shaw rolls over to the side after she falls down and lives.
2179: (insert Aliens running moment here)
2215: Minho is born.
2216: Thomas is born.
January 21, 2232: Thomas and Minho outrun a Griever in a straight line in the closing wall portion of the maze surrounding the Glade. Minho is the first to make it to the other side before the wall starts closing and before the Griever shows up. Thomas is next and barely manages to escape the Griever and the closing wall.

3 comments:

  1. For those confused as to where the placement of the Prometheus running scene in Harry Potter is as well as the characters' birthdates in this timeline, I must tell you that in the original book series, they mentioned Harry Potter's 11th birthday (also mentioned as being on July 31) being on a Tuesday, but it's on a Wednesday in 1991, which puts his 11th birthday as being in either 1990 or 2001, the same way as Walter White's 52nd birthday (which is on September 7, see timeline on breakingbad.wikia.com) is on a Tuesday, which it isn't in 2011, but it is in 2010. Additionally, the book Goblet of Fire (released in 2000) mentions a PlayStation at the beginning when Harry Potter's letter to Sirius Black says that Dudley got angry and threw his PlayStation out the window, but also the PlayStation came out on December 3, 1994, so it's later the same year as to when that part of the book takes place. The film adaptations also have more ties to the present day-2000s of their production (this also includes the last 3 books before they were adapted for film, since they were also made in the 2000s) in which Half-Blood Prince (which starts in the summer of 1996) has the Millennium Bridge appear, which wasn't completed and opened until 2000, and the film also opens up with a building with a reflection of The Gherkin, which wasn't opened until April 28, 2004. In Sorcerer's Stone, the Dursleys' car, as well as all of the other cars in the neighborhood (see harry potter.wikia.com for Vernon and Petunia's cars), are a 2000 Vauxhall-Vectra estate when they are driving Dudley to the zoo for his birthday, and during the doorstep delivery scene from the beginning from the film, they are all a 1990 Vauxhall Cavalier. In Order of the Phoenix (see scifi.stackexchange.com for Does Harry Potter contradict any historical events?), their car is a 2004 Vauxhall Astra with a 2006 issue date and in Deathly Hallows Part 1, their car is a 2008 Vauxhall Vectra sedan with a 2007 issue date. Now, if this seems at least 10 years out of place to you, it's because the Harry Potter series was set 10 years earlier than it was made. Now, maybe J.K. Rowling made it that way so that wizards wouldn't have heard or known about too many of Muggle/non-magic technological advancements back then, but considering that many of the kid actors who were playing characters that were 11 Sorcerer's Stone were born in 1990 or 1-3 years before that (who would be 11 in 2001, the year this film came out), maybe Nearly Headless Nick's death day in Chamber of Secrets (book) should have been in 1502 instead of 1492, and James Potter's Seeker trophy plaque from Sorcerer's Stone (film) should have had the year 1982 on it instead of 1972. Therefore, mostly everything I just said here actually puts the series in 2001-2008 since it would be much less anachronistic that way than it being set in 1991-1998. Plus, the cars that appear on the highway in Deathly Hallows Part 1 are way too modern for Harry Potter to not be firmly set in the 21st century (see Wall Bangers/Film on tvtropes.org), and anyone there would have seen and reported the Death Eater strike the trailer and make it fall over when trying to get Harry Potter and Rubeus Hagrid in a time of camera phones, dashboard cameras, and near-worldwide internet access, and this was in 2007, the same year when iPhones came out and on July 27, the same day when The Simpsons Movie was released! However, this film thankfully never had to deal with those consequences in the Muggle/non-magic world because Harry, Ron, and Hermione were out camping for most of the film on their mission to find the 5 remaining Horcruxes (but only 1 was actually destroyed in this film).

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  2. Even though My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic is set in a fantasy storybook world that sits somewhere between the medieval period and the Edwardian Era of the early 20th century, sometimes the writers will allow themselves to break the rules a little to allow in a piece of technology that they wouldn't normally allow to exist, like when Button Mash was playing video games in Hearts and Hooves Day during the part of the son The Perfect Stallion when Sweetie Belle said "This one's too young" when referring to Button Mash, and the film reel from Hurricane Fluttershy when the pegs were watching an instructional video about getting water to make rain clouds, and DJ Pon-3 also had headphones and an automatic keyboard that played dubstep music in Slice of Life when Octavia said that she wanted the music at Cranky and Matilda's wedding to be special. This show also seems to have a modern mindset about girls, like the lesson from A Dog and Pony Show that "just because someone is ladylike doesn't make them weak." Much like the Harry Potter universe, this show usually looks like it's in an earlier time period because technology seems to be mostly frozen here (while the human world from Equestrian Girls with modern technology is My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic's equivalent to the non-magic world in Harry Potter) yet the characters don't act like it is. That's how come the timeline with Twilight Sparkle's birth date and running date is closer to now and not a century from before Owl's Well That Ends Well aired, and my mom keeps continually telling me every time I ask her that Twilight Sparkle wasn't born yet when Kevin, Stuart and Bob came to New York City in 1968 in Minions and she just came to Ponyville in 2010 when Kevin, Stuart and Bob were going to help Gru steal the moon in Despicable Me.

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  3. The Lion King (1994) takes place in a remote African land, so although the time period wouldn't affect the general story, the characters still seem to have current attitudes and The Lion King and The Lion King 1 1/2 still reference outside stuff sometimes, like the songs It's A Small World After All (1963), The Lion Sleeps Tonight (1961), and Jungle Boogie (1973), and there was also one part of The Lion King 1 1/2 where Timon said "Something tells me this ain't the traveling company of Riverdance" referring to the line of hyenas walking during Scar's Be Prepared song. Riverdance was inspired by Timedance at the 1981 Eurovision Song Contest and Bill Whelan was invited to perform it 13 years later at the 1994 Eurovision Song Contest. Hey, that's the same year that this movie came out! I also determined the date based on the fact that there was a waning crescent moon at the time. The following Timon and Pumbaa series also has a lot more modern humans and current locations appear in it, since Timon and Pumbaa seem to travel a lot in that series. To be honest, I only saw 1 episode of that series before I wrote this comment and it was the first episode.

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